Monday, March 31, 2008
Midhusband Appointment #2
Wednesday is our 2nd appointment with the used car salesman who is going to deliver the baby. I hope that he either shapes up and gets more interested in what's going on with me, or I get the balls to pick another, less skeevy midwife. All I want to say is that I'm really, really not looking forward to this. It's the first internal exam and I can't imagine that it won't be terribly uncomfortable. Everything (everything) is very tender and I cramp up just thinking about instruments going where god didn't intend for instruments to go. Maybe I'd be less worried if a woman was examining me, I don't know. I didn't think that was an issue a few weeks ago when I enthusiastically selected the midhusband, but now? Not only am I scared that he will maul my stuff, but that once he starts mauling me, my husband will tear him to shreds. Never will an examining room be so bloody. Okay, I do know that actually giving birth will be way more uncomfortable, but there's something about foreign objects going in as opposed to organic objects naturally being ejected out. I guess I should have been more aware of that to begin with; seems that's what got me into this mess.
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3 comments:
Well, if it makes you feel better I have an internal on Weds too. To see if I am dilated at all. (My guess 1cm. Thinking about taking over/unders on it.)
You know, I think that we get all wrapped up in the idea that we should have this personal relationship with our vagina care giver. Having worked with many whom I would not care to have a professional relationship with, much less a personal one, it seems to me that whole notion has been wicked romanticized. Having changed a horse midstream because of bad care, I can say I only wish I had done it sooner. And lucky me, the new practice is full of smartasses. It feels like home to me.
So... what's the breaking point? When do you think it's a good idea to look for another vagina-prober? Do you think that the hospital's L/D staff is what matters most in the end? How do you fire a midwife? Then, how do you find a new one?
Yes, the L&D nurse was the highlight of the medical stuff throughout my pregnancy, labor, and recovery. Even M really liked her. Too bad you don't get to pick them out. (I guess that is why so many people hire a doula--and in that you get to have someone to teach you and nurture you throughout your pregnancy vs medical staff.) M and my Mom were begging me to change practices after they failed to get me IV fluid a couple of times. They could see me heading downhill, fast. There were a couple of things that were just plain bad care and so I got to the point were I didn't feel safe. So I switched. I filled out a records request and had me records forwarded to the new practice. The practice manager called me and we discussed my concerns, she was sorry, but did not try and talk me into staying.
(I picked the new practice based on a couple of things. It is small, with 4 OBs. They have RNPs who will see you but who do not deliver-a NC thing. Also, a friend said when she moved here pregnant and didn't know anybody she called the L&D unit and asked a few nurses who'd they'd go too. And that is how she found this practice.)
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