Stellar Performance

After listening to me for 4 hours and patiently hearing (over and over again) all about the following complaints,

1. never-ending diarrhea
2. itchy butt
3. bug bites
4. the Jeep is very hard to get into when you're pregnant
5. it will take too long to wait for the deli to slice ham
6. I hate my job
7. WHY WON'T THE DOGS STOP FOLLOWING ME AROUND?
8. WHY ARE THE DOGS BREATHING SO LOUDLY?
9. everything is dirty and smelly
10. crickets are gross
11. etc.

...TD did the most brilliant impression of me. I laughed so hard, I started yelling about how my stomach hurts, which, obviously, provided more fodder. The best part is that TD ad-libbed some complaints that I've made in my head and had no idea that he guessed them. Just when I thought I wasn't being heard, my own obnoxious words came flying back to me, all screechy and 4-letter-word-ridden. Touche, TD!

p.s. Happy Birthday, Mom! Wish we could celebrate together.